a) They started brawling as soon as los technicos came out, not waiting for the intros to conclude. Fairly short with los rudos controlling Rayo. However, Universo took the opening loss via a slam reversal into a small package by Rayo.

b) Picking up where they left off, los rudos triple teamed Rayo while his so far absent partners just stood on the floor. Rayo finally escaped and then Niebla and Mano took turns taking punishment. Rayo attempted to repeat the first finish as he came back in and turned a Universo backdrop attempt into another small package. This time Dos Mil and Dantes reversed it to tie it up.

c) Los rudos continued the theme by tripling up on Rayo once again and nearly unmasking him. The action then spilled to the floor with the faces temporarily gaining the advantage. After some Richie Cunningham style hum-drum stuff, Universo fully unmasked Rayo and stuffed the hood in his trunks to avoid a DQ by being seen with two masks. This led to Rayo on the floor face down and out. Universo then rolled up Niebla and Dos Mil copied that on Mano for the victory. Pretty bad match that was fairly confusing as well. Los techs didn’t have heat with each other but they also didn’t work together at all and everyone moving like they were swimming in molasses really sunk this battleship to near dud level.

a) Unlike the show’s curtain jerker, these guys started out hot on were on like neckbone throughout. Damn good finishing sequence with Hombre hitting Virus (who was up on Marvin’s shoulders Road Warriors style) with a crossbody for a pin. Marvin then caught X in la magistral to end the opening fall.

b) This was a quick rudos route. Great teamwork by them which eventually saw Hombre fall to a basement dropkick by X followed by Felino losing to a combo frankensteiner (as called by the announcers) off the turnbuckles by Zumbido and then a top-drop splash by X to force a rubber match.

c) Another very good fall. Felino was like a cat out of hell here and won over Zumbido with a running powerbomb. Serious highspots were aplenty here with Marvin being seriously impressive in leading the charge and going sky high several times. Great match with Marvin stealing the show from Felino and X in the end.

a) Platino and V3 were los capitan’s. It’s hard to take the bad guys seriously when they come out to a goofy version of the Pink Panther theme. It’s also difficult to watch Ralphus’ latino cousin Plata do his Super Porky towel dance. As a matter of fact, that is downright nauseating. Total nation of domination by Fuerza and company including a blade job by Oro and then him tapping to an abdominal stretch. Prior to that Plata gave up to a eagle stretch (Fuerza’s foot between his shoulder blades and each Villano pulling his arms back).

b) Plata’s Porky Pig power prevailed here over all 3 heels at once. Platino y Oro lined them up next to each other on the mat and Plata came off the top with a splash and pin on them all simultaneously.

c) This was the most even fall that saw Oro fall to Fuerza after a standing senton and then Platino one-up him by coming off the top with a senton bomb on V4 that Plata took the cover on. Plata then spun the wheel and sealed the deal by catching III with a splash and then returning the favor by allowing Platino to end things with the cover. Below average, but not as bad as the first match on this show.

a) Los Guerreros De Inferno definitely have one of the coolest looks a group can ever hope for. They are also one of the more innovative trios you’ll ever see. Total control over the first fall by them with serious inventive spots by Tarzan & company made them a real pleasure to watch here. Atlantis was beaten down then was declared too down too continue as he was face first on the mat as Los Guerreros posed over him.

b) This didn’t last long however as Atlantis got fired up and los technicos threw down on the second fall. It went by quickly as well (about 3 minutes like the first), but the faces showed that they can toss out some pretty damn good spots as well including the backbreaker Atlantis caught Rey in for the even upper (they were awarded the fall despite this being the only decision in it).

c) Unfortunately this had more clipping than a barbershop. They showed about 2 minutes of the deciding fall and most of it was cut-aways to the crowd. Rey hooked Lizmark in an STF while Ultimo hit a sweet reverse suplex off the top on Olimpico for the clincher. It’s just Night Court in it’s fifth season lame that they butchered this match because these guys were building towards something really special over the first 2 falls. Instead of showing the joke of the first match they should’ve aired this in it’s entirety because it was about as good as it gets in lucha libre.

 

AAA Taped Hexagon in Orizaba, Ver

 

Reina de Reinas Single Elimination Match: Martha Villalobos, Mujer Demente, Miss Janeth, Hechicera, La Chola, Tiffany, Cinthia Moreno, Esther Moreno, Lady Apache, Lady Rabbit, Estrellita, Fugitiva

Like EMLL, AAA opened with an atrocious match. The difference though is that this went nearly a half an hour and got progressively worse as they went on. And really, it’s pretty sad when workwise you can get more satisfaction watching Stratusfaction have a better match then the one you’re reviewing. The first part was just weeding out the superscrubs with 2 moves and then the finish until they finally got down to the final four of Martha Villalobos, Miss Janeth, Esther Moreno, & Lady Apache. Villalobos eliminated Janeth with a splash after Janeth (Miss Jackson if you nasty) missed a second rope dropkick. Unlike the end of Heathers, Martha Dumptruck didn’t have much of a chance to celebrate though as Apache caught her with an armdrag off the middle rope and then her and Grandma Esther did the double pin. After an elongated sequence of near falls where Apache tried for drama but Moreno failed, las rudas interfered causing this mess to end in a no-contest. And it was only fitting because considering the performances of all 12 women here the title would’ve meant nothing if anyone actually had won it because Apache was the only one who looked even remotely competent at even the basic stuff.

Thankfully this match was followed by a hilarious vignette featuring Jon Gruden Jr. and Cujie. Cujie was being interviewed in a park when suddenly Chucky emerged out of a giant planter hole in the sidewalk, and after mocking Cujie to his back he gave him a swift kick in the ass. Cujie got scared and bailed as Chucky chased after him while the announcer marked out. Suddenly, Chucky’s Child’s Play turned into a horror movie for him as he stopped dead in his tracks. After a great shocked gesticulation from him, he headed the other way as Cujie and Albrijie chased after him. One of the greatest 45 second segments you’ll ever see that almost made up for the previous 1,800 seconds that led into it.

a) Nice start with dueling dances from los capitans and then some Shemp action from Parka after a pushoff pressdrop by Cibernetico. Next in were Monster and Alebrije. Cujie got involved, and literally was tossed around like a Cabbage Patch Kid by Monster. In more comedic genius from them, Alebrije jumped on his fallen friend and then pulled him out of harms way. Then he broke a tackle and headed down the aisle like it was the open field carrying Cujie to the locker room for the game winning touchdown. As the camera’s cut back to the ring, Abismo was disqualified for playing roll shambo with Zorro and off camera the other guys were DQ’d for something as well. This didn’t matter to them however, as Chucky did his shuckie and jive with fists and feet of fury on Lover while Electroshock held him up.

b) Alebrijie returned between falls only to get his mask ripped by Monster. Meanwhile, Lover was in the crowd surrounded by a lot of consoling women. Abismo chased them off though and after a cut-away Lover rolled up Electroshock while Zorro revenged the throng by doing the same to Abismo for the endgame. The 6 minutes shown was way to short to get any feel for how it went, but it was pretty good while it lasted. Afterwards, Monster and Cibernetico got into a shoving match which culminated with Cibernetico pulling off the rubber monster mask to reveal Canek. Canek then left his partners (except Chucky) and Alebrije laying.

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